Last Saturday evening I had the great pleasure of hosting a birthday party for myself. The reason it was so special was because I have made so many great friends in the last several months and many of them came to the soiree.

Almost eveyone brought an instrument to play and we had guitars, banjos, hammered dulcimers, fiddles, mandolins, a bouzouki, harmonicas, a Celtic harp, and lots of voices. I trequested that it be more of an individual performance night with less accompaniment so things wouldn’t turn into a noise fest.

It was fabulous! Lots of good food, drink and music non-stop until past midnight. Because these people are already good friends with my ladyfriend, they have kindly adopted me into the gang. Great people to be with.

Personally, I have had “my gold watch in pawn” for many, many years. Which means that the gifts and desires that I have had musically and friendwise have had to wait until now. Family, a disagreeable spouse, work and a restrictive fundamentalist church all served to keep me waiting.

Now it is as if the curtains have opened and all these wonderful people have appeared. So easy to be with and so many common interests. I look forward to a long time together doing many fun and wholesome things.

My 21 year old son had just come home for the season and was present with two friends. He was all smiles to see me so happy! Hopefully my other children will see the effects and good atmosphere over time. They are used to seeing me work, and work and work.

Check out the family stress related articles on our site!

Have you ever known somebody who seemed to nearly always be “the victim?” It doesn’t matter what the event is; somehow it always turns out that the other person is to blame and is trying to do something like take advantage of the “victim.”

Here is an example from real life. I know a teenaged boy who began using marijuana for fun with his friends. Eventually he began selling it at school, until he was caught and arrested. Naturally he blamed his father, who had given the school permission to search his backpack.

Next, he neglected to do his community service to the point where he actually moved out of state to live with his mother. He hoped that she would somehow take care of his obligation for him. As a result of his decision to ignore his service and move away, he failed grade 10.

That was also his father’s fault, because he had given the permission at the school. When it turned out that life was not so rosey at his Mom’s, he requested to move back with his father. Unfortunately, you can never jump into a stream at the same place twice. He now had to begin at a new school, in a different town.

This transition was a failure. Of course, it was his father’s fault for having to move to a new location, due to their previous rental property being sold.

So, the boy hatched a remarkable plan to get out of his predicament. He decided to portray his father as abusive. In this way he could get to move to California with his older siblings and life would be just grand.

Day after day he acted out, making normal life impossible at home. He would disappear for days at a time, never phoning or attempting to be responsible. When he did return home, he was exhausted, wasted, and full of drugs. Then, when Monday would come for school, he could just miss his ride (naturally it was the driver’s fault), or neglect to catch the school bus.

In the evenings he would harrass his father, interrupting his work, annoying him to the point of confrontation. Then, amazingly, the boy would fall to the floor, crying out for help! “Stop hitting me! Stop hitting me!” The father was stunned at this behavior and eventually sought help with counseling.

Sadly, the story ended with the boy getting his wish to move to California. His older brother, who has an even bigger problem with the “victim mentality,” bailed on everybody and withdrew his “support.” It became painfully obvious to everyone that the older brother has a substantial mental problem.

The story is, of course, not over. Where there is life, there is hope. Hopefully, the boy will see the pattern he has lived and get some help. The entire family suffers as a result and the dysfuntion just continues until there is some self-acknowledgment and change.

Some women have tried many, many methods to find relief from the discomfort of hot flashes, only to be disappointed. Hot flashes are one of the most common symptoms of menopause, yet there is no reason to continue to suffer.

One way to find relief is to use satin type sheets. Often they feel cooler to the skin than cotton or other blends. The sheen texture is comforting to the touch and helps to cool the body.

Keeping a few pillows on hand often helps as well. By changing pillows or turning over the pillow, your face and head are kept cool.

Eye Pillows

Eye pillows have helped many women who could get no relief whatsoever. You can read all about them on our sister site: Safe Menopause Relief